Jill: Lill, there’s something wrong with my new liquid eyeshadow…can you read the label for possible side effects?
Lill: Ack! Your lids have inflated! Can you even open your eyes?!
Jill: *Grumble* If I could, would I be asking you to read the label?
Lill: *Snigger* Ah, I suspect your new liquid eyeshadow may not in fact be the problem.
Jill: That’s impossible! My face looks like Laila Ali’s punching bag!
Lill: Then perhaps you should exercise more discretion when choosing where to apply your similarly packaged lip plumper…