*Lill arrives home from work*
Jill: Hey, how was your day?
Lill: *Sigh* Fabulous from about 9:02 to 9:04.
Lill: You know the super hot courier that visits
me my building every glorious day?
Jill: The one with the chiseled cheeks?
Lill: Yeah, and he does good face too – well he was on the elevator with me this morning…a very FULL elevator I might add – so full in fact there was little room to move…
Jill: Sounds interesting.
Lill: Oh it was – by the fifth floor I had backed right into him and by the 9th he was rubbing my ass.
Jill: Hmmm…dirty elevator gropage – skeezy Lillian but novel for an otherwise standard Tuesday.
Lill: That’s what I thought too…until we hit the 15th floor.
Jill: *Raises eyebrow*
Lill: It was when the doors opened that I noticed the pleasantly dexterous hand on my ass start to vibrate.
Jill: So the hand…
Lill: Was in FACT a rather bulbous fanny pack holding an altogether different device.
Jill: How tragic.
Lill: *Sigh* Indeed – all I wanted was a little morning sexual molestation to go with my Starbucks – was I expecting too much?
Jill: You might want to try being more approachable.
Lill: *Crosses arms* I have breasts Jillian – what more do I really need to do?
Jill: Well, for a start you might want to consider removing the “I have a Taser and am not afraid to use it Asshole” button from your bag…