*Sunday AM*

Jill: Lillian wake up and get dressed! We’re leaving in 10 minutes!

Lill: *Groggy* Wha..?! Why are you waking me up at such an ungodly hour and why are you wearing your hooker spandex?

Jill: *Sigh* They’re running shorts Lillian – and we’re doing the Terry Fox Run today, remember?

Lill: *Yawn* In what inebriated state did you force me into to get my consent for such a ghastly activity? Me, RUN?! Have you been eating your lipgloss? The notion is barbaric Jillian – you’re clearly lying and using my drowsiness to con me into doing something both healthy AND charitable – two life pursuits I work very hard to avoid at all times.

Jill: *Raises eyebrow* I have a copy of your registration form here plus a signed and dated contract of consent drafted by my legal associate from work – it’s also been witnessed by Darren. There’s a smoothie for you on the counter – I’ll be waiting in the lobby with your running shoes.

Lill: *Eyes widen* This can’t be happening, this can’t…

*Lillian wakes up from her nightmare*

Lill: *Panting* Oh God, that was terrifying…

Jill: Lillian wake up! Have you seen my running shorts?

Lill: *Eyes widen*

Jill: I made you a smoothie – are you getting up?

Lill: *Hiding under covers* No – no you can’t make me! I won’t do it!

Jill: The Run? I know Lill, you don’t have to – you collected over $500 from your office so you could stay home today read crap books and eat your weight in doughnuts while I did the run.

Lill: So…so there’s no contract? No running shoes?

Jill: Erm…contract?! No, not that I’m aware of…and I don’t think you actually own a pair of running shoes.

Lill: *Claps hands* You’re right! I don’t! Isn’t it MARVELOUS?!

Jill: *Leaving* Riiight, I’m going now – thanks again for collecting those donations. Enjoy your cowboy werewolves and Boston Creams.

*Jill shuts the door*

Lill: Meh, so I’m charitable for a day – at least I still get to eat my doughnuts.


About Lill and Jill

We are Lillian and Jillian; best friends and roommates. We blog to capture the seemingly trivial moments of thought and expression that make us smile; the often-times ridiculous way we see the world and how we live in it. We ask that you think well of us despite our propensity for drinking saccharine-laden alcoholic beverages, affection for 90′s boy-bands, and regular inappropriateness.

2 responses »

  1. jensine says:

    well donuts have no calories as they really are just a hole

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