Jill: Lillian wake up and get dressed! We’re leaving in 10 minutes!
Lill: *Groggy* Wha..?! Why are you waking me up at such an ungodly hour and why are you wearing your hooker spandex?
Jill: *Sigh* They’re running shorts Lillian – and we’re doing the Terry Fox Run today, remember?
Lill: *Yawn* In what inebriated state did you force me into to get my consent for such a ghastly activity? Me, RUN?! Have you been eating your lipgloss? The notion is barbaric Jillian – you’re clearly lying and using my drowsiness to con me into doing something both healthy AND charitable – two life pursuits I work very hard to avoid at all times.
Jill: *Raises eyebrow* I have a copy of your registration form here plus a signed and dated contract of consent drafted by my legal associate from work – it’s also been witnessed by Darren. There’s a smoothie for you on the counter – I’ll be waiting in the lobby with your running shoes.
Lill: *Eyes widen* This can’t be happening, this can’t…
*Lillian wakes up from her nightmare*
Lill: *Panting* Oh God, that was terrifying…
Jill: Lillian wake up! Have you seen my running shorts?
Lill: *Eyes widen*
Jill: I made you a smoothie – are you getting up?
Lill: *Hiding under covers* No – no you can’t make me! I won’t do it!
Jill: The Run? I know Lill, you don’t have to – you collected over $500 from your office so you could stay home today read crap books and eat your weight in doughnuts while I did the run.
Lill: So…so there’s no contract? No running shoes?
Jill: Erm…contract?! No, not that I’m aware of…and I don’t think you actually own a pair of running shoes.
Lill: *Claps hands* You’re right! I don’t! Isn’t it MARVELOUS?!
Jill: *Leaving* Riiight, I’m going now – thanks again for collecting those donations. Enjoy your cowboy werewolves and Boston Creams.
*Jill shuts the door*
Lill: Meh, so I’m charitable for a day – at least I still get to eat my doughnuts.